“Hydrocephalus Gulfus”, the Great Neglected Condition in the Gulf Region-Part II

Dear readers,

As I promised you, I'm going to share with you some of the preliminary results of the our project in Hydrocephalus Gulfus...

• Classification
It isn’t an easy job to study such condition and classify the cases into seperate groups, so what I'm going to do is to show you different classifications according to different measures.

According to local artists,

But speaking scientifically or medically, it can be classified according to its appearance (morphology) to:

1. Vertical: this one of the most dangerous types in the cinemas and the classrooms. You have to change your seat as soon as you discover a case in front of you, otherwise you’ll end up with صوت بدون صورة
The height of such outgrowth is really variable and it has been observed that it’s in increase especially after the latest reports from authorities in Muscat to increase the allowed height of buildings. The government is really worried about the impact of such vertical hydrocephalus on the bridges in Muscat.

2. Horizontal: might be considered less dangerous.
3. Anterior-posterior

According to the severity of the case (which is really judged by the size of the outgrowth) to:

1. Mild Chronic (growing slowly thus small sized). This type is usually seen in ladies who are not experienced enough in this field.
2. Acute severe (looks like the explosion of the nuclear bomb that hit Hiroshima!! This one might be mistaken with the classical hydrocephalus which requires immediate surgical intervention)

• Impact on other fields

1. The prices of the following items have increased (which are used to create the Hydrocephalus Gulfus) and at one stage local markets became deficient of such items:
• Yoghurt containers/cans
• Happy meal boxes
• XXXXXXXXL hair clips with birds feather

2. Scientists have concerns that patients with Hydrocephalus Gulfus may develop some complications like disc prolapsed and back pain due to the heavy weight of the contents used to create Hydrocephalus Gulfus.

3. Recent studies have shown a positive correlation between the number of Hydrocephalus Gulfus cases and the reported cases of children suffering of night terrors!!!...also, one cohort study conducted in College of Medicine-SQU showed that those students setting in the back of the MLT scored a big F in their finals simply because they couldn’t see the ppt slide projection!!! Poor people…

4. Children nurseries became less crowded, women no longer worry about keeping their children with housemaids and thus family expenditure per month had decreased…thanx to Hydrocephalus Gulfus that created extra space for women to carry their children with them at any time and any where :)

And many others which I cannot declare now,
For those who care for the happiness and continuity of humankind, plz help to stop such endemic…

“Hydrocephalus Gulfus”, the Great Neglected Condition in the Gulf Region

• Definition

The word hydrocephalus derives from the Greek words hydro, meaning water, and cephalus, meaning head. Hydrocephalus is an abnormal accumulation of fluid in the brain which causes enlargement of the skull and compression of the brain, destroying much of the neural tissue. Hydrocephalus Gulfus is a new type of hydrocephalus which is acquired by females between the age of 12-70 years. After the huge discussions and debates that took place recently in the World Health Organization (WHO) and the Center of Disease Control (CDC), scientists decided to call it (Hydrocephalus Gulfus) because it is almost only seen in the gulf region.

• History

In 2007, Hydrocephalus Gulfus grabbed the attention of the scientists worldwide to the extent that journals and magazines became full of articles with theories trying to explain this disease which they started calling it “The Disease of the Year 2008”. At that stage it was crucial to reach to a conclusion of how did this endemic of Hydrocephalus Gulfus started? And when was that exactly?? Also, what is the home town of it? So the WHO assigned 15 billion dollars for this purpose and 3anz MD medical institution through the president of the United Nations (UN) received a letter asking me to be the head of the research team responsible of enlightening the whole world about this issue. In this series of posts I’ll give you the privilege of being the first ppl to know about the preliminary results (because the research project is still running in all the six gulf countries) of this huge project which will be published later in the British Medical Journal.

To be continued :)